By 7:50 a.m. the sunlight is overwhelming this little entry area that is guarded by a security camera, but after two quick turns into the building, I'm walking a long hallway that is barely lit by a couple old government-issue flourescent lights. If you've read Joseph Heller's Something Happened you'll remember him starting the book with those first words, "I get the willies when I see closed doors," and that's how I feel about long empty hallways with low lighting.
I start feeling like something horrible is going to happen and I pull out my phone, pretend to dial and begin having a pretend conversation with my dentist, "Oh hello Doctor Birdie, yes 9:00 will do, how have you been? Oh that is so nice to hear, I've just been training quite a bit at the gym lately," but I'm not actually talking to anyone, I'm just adding a pretended companion to the situation so I have some company in the dark hallway.
I'm just getting to the part where I tell him my wisdom teeth have been acting up again and my phone goes dead in my hand. I get this feeling in my stomach like my colon is on Mars, and the entire contents of my torso have shifted towards my loafers and now I'm sweating, looking for the exit door to the stairwell that takes me to the safety of my office.
I remember something Rickson said, can hear it in this doped up accent, "You have to find comfort in uncomfortable situations." Just then the flourescents go out, there is a click and the hum of a clanking generator and I'm alone in the red glow of the emergency lighting system. That's it, I'm fucked and I know it. Something bad is about to happen and there is nothing I can do about it.
I log into MMA.tv, load a thread and see that for the second day in a row I have been voted down, lost three full votes again. Haven't even started a thread for a few days, I'm being stalked by a complete stranger. A reminder of how vulnerable we all are. Where is your Jiu-Jitsu now, playboy? You can't pull guard on a phantom.