Update: Faith, Family, Friends, Fighting and...
Member Since: 10/23/08
And in that order.
Before you flame away because of one word in the title, I thought I'd fill in the UG on what is going on in my life. Why? Because a thread was started that I missed with a few curious people about when I'd fight again, thanks Ecko/Slovin for checking in on me :-)
I'm driving and Moving back to Tejas...
Going back to the war-torn Congo to love "the unloveables" and to fight for a forgotten people.
Bible College. From the youngest fighter on The Ultimate Fighter... To the oldest guy enrolling in Bible college (maybe, not fact).
And fighting... Where does that come in? When am I fighting? How can I do both... And more...
If your interested, prepare for a NOVEL! Sorry for the length... I challenge you to read if your gonna flame... but u already got some good ammo. :-)
Right this second I'm in the middle of nowhere driving a uhaul back to DFW full of ALL my stuff... Honestly I'd have never thought I'd be moving back to DFW... I love Colorado, Grudge, Coach T, the mountains, all the guys at the gym, and the list goes on and on... And on. (side note: if your looking to move somewhere incredible... Did I mention CO is pretty awesome?)
So the top two questions I get asked are as follows...
1. When is your next fight?
2. How can you be a Christian and fight?
The first answer is I don't know... I'm pretty healed up from an injury now... But more than that I've been trying to get my life in line with living with a heart on fire (passion), and a life on purpose (meaning).
I don't want to go back to being the depressed, drunk, drug addict that I had became a little before TUF, and even more after. I missed one of my best friends weddings... Being the best man... Because I don't remember approx 2 months of my life. My other best friend I kicked out of my house bc he was trying to help me get back to being a sober, passionate fighter pursuing my dreams and talents.
I'll go back to fighting in the right timing. I believe that's not my timing, it's God's. Pops knows best, He knows me better than I know myself. If He opens the door... I'll gladly jump through it.
2. How can I be a Christian and fight?
A: How can I be a Christian and NOT fight?!?!? As a Christian you step onto a battleground... We all know life is a fight, more of a fight than ANY cage fight, and it will leave you a lot worse off than a 15-25 minute beating. This world isn't a playground... It's a battleground.
If your a Christian your meant to fight... Fight for your faith, your family, your wives, your kiddos, your friends... Your meant to fight for Orphans who can't defend themselves, to care for them... Fight for hurting people to have clean water, shelter... To fight for the hungry to have food... Fight for Pygmies to not be enslaved, raped, killed, eaten... To make a difference, to impact people's lives... To fight against things trying to stop yourself from loving God passionately, and loving people fiercely.
So if your still reading what's next for me?
I've been trying to learn to walk through life not relying on my "ability" but learning to rely on my AVAILABILITY... To God.
When I relied on my ability... When I relied on my self significance, life purpose, and all my happiness being in living out my dream of being a fighter... I ended up a depressed, drunk, drug addict. The order was Fighting, Family, Friends... With no Faith. Everything crumbled... Everything shattered... Everything was dark and desperate.
1 year, 11 months and 21 days ago I rearranged the order.
Faith, Family, Friends... Fighting. It changed my life drastically. It got me off drugs, literally I talked to a Teen Challenge drug rehab last night with one of my best friends present, mother, and grandmother and they attested it's only because of GOD that I didn't have to go through INTENSIVE rehab. It brought peace into my life, fulfillment, purpose and joy... Drugs brought me happiness... God brings me joy. God made me go from someone Grudge training center didn't want at their gym (they voted me off)... To someone that yesterday they were saying they were going to miss, hated to see me go & always have a home there. Only God could transform a person like that... U don't like yourself? Others don't like you? Give God a chance to work in your heart! Even if people don't like u, like some of you not liking me right now... My JOY comes from God and on me loving people in need and it doesn't rely on y'all liking me.
God set me free from the 3D vision I created (depressed, drunk, druggie)... And replaced it with a God given 3D vision... Taking the HOPE of Christ to the Dark, Dangerous, Despised places of the world. To either take them Jesus... Take them water... Give them shelter... Something to better their lives.
So how am I going to pursue that? Why am I moving back to Texas?
Availability... To God.
I'm moving back for the very same reason I moved to Colorado. In Colorado I felt I had the best coaching and training partners I could imagine... In DFW I feel like I have the best spiritual coaching and training partners I could find. People with similar passions and relationships with God. People further along than me, people who will be incredible coaches and make me better.
How am I going to get coaching? I'm being "discipled/coached" by a means pastor at a great church.. And... Drumroll... This is where all the haters will explode... And I'll lose more support, more will want to see me get smashed and where most people will have a "heyday" in their responses.
I'm going to Bible College! Where I'm going to have my own heyday! You have yours heyday flaming me, I'll have mine pursuing something I'm passionate about :-)
I'm going to be pursuing Christian Ministry and Missions.
God doesn't NEED my/ur ability.. But he desires my/ur availability!
Not sure how I'm going to financially do it, not sure if I'm going to use my spiritual gift of "laying hands" on people to pay my way through it... Not sure if I'm gonna be a roofer... Not sure if I can intern at a Church...
Not sure if I'll flip burgers... But God doesn't call the qualified... Because I'm definitely not... But He qualifies the called. I feel like this is what I'm suppose to do, and I'm going to chase it with more fervor than I have EVER pursued anything.
What's my biggest fear?
What's my biggest weakness?
What's my strength?
Big dumb wrestler/fighter
Why would I EVER pursue what is my bigger fear and weakness? Because I've given God my availability. I want to impact people's lives and watch God work in their lives like He did mine. I want to see captives set free, druggies drop their dope... And I want HOPE to be given to anyone who feels "hopeless."
I want to fight more than I ever have in my life, but even greater I want to pursue the God who has been TOO good to me.
God doesn't need my ability... Because if I give him my availability He can increase any ability or inability I have and use it for His glory.
So I am waiting... Preparing... And building a foundation. I'll fight in God's timing, if Pops sends me back... Some of you might care, some of you definitely don't... Some of you might want to see me pound some dudes... And some definitely want to see me get pounded.
Right now I'm going back and planning my next trip to the Pygmies... If you've seen Kony2012 I'm going back to where I was before... Where the LRA and other rebel groups in the Congo hunt Pygmies down like animals to eat for superhuman power... Where Pygmies practice witchcraft... Where some Pygmies fled from us at first thinking I was a "ghost" because they hadn't even HEARD of white skin... And I'm going there to live with them for a month or more... To hunt antelope, to eat with, and to do life with them....To learn about their culture... To see how we can BETTER their lives... To see how we can buy them their own land where they hopefully could be treated fairly... Where we can hopefully change the 1 out of 2 kids being born and then dying before their five yrs old... Get them clean water where they don't drink from stagnant, disgusting water... and take HOPE and love to some people who have been deemed "unlovable" by every people group surrounding them.
After that bible college in September....
And I don't have a real solid answer for fighting... All I know is I will always be a fighter, I'm still a viking... I'm just a little more of a tender warrior now.
Thanks for your time and sorry for the frat...
I pray you guys will live a passionate, fulfilled, joyful life wherever you are. With your hearts on fire... And lives on purpose.
Ok... Flame away ;-)
One thing I want people to know about me is I love u guys, LOVE the UG and their are some knuckleheads but when someone states their opinion and belief I respect it. I do that in the Congo too.
If u don't believe... That's alright, I pray one day through your own way, your own process, your own experience that can change if you ever decide to open up... But if not, we can still be friends :-)
Guys just because I'm a Christian doesn't mean I automatically throw out your opinion and knowledge because we have differing beliefs, nor do I think of myself as "better" cause I KNOW that I am no better than anyone... And I mean anyone. I'm just BLESSED God, only God took me and snatched me out of the deep dark pit I dove into... Once I asked Him too.
I don't go to the Pygmies to force anything on em... I don't "force" anything on anyone.
I just share my personal experience. I shared at a prison two weeks ago and afterwards instead of hanging out with the Christians in the jail I hung out with the Muslims because they invited me over for conversation and lunch... Green hamburgers! Lol...
I respect every poster here... I just know how real God is.
I may not be where I need to be... But THANK GOD I'm not where I use to be! Phone Post
Brian Rule -
You do realize this can be done entirely without religious doctrine, no?
As mindbottling as 'faith' is to me if it makes you a better person then that's cool and I'm genuinely happy for you. Just please try keeping it to yourself (...actually I know that won't happen). But just please avoid the unavoidable temptation to control the freedoms of others.
I don't control ANYBODY's freedom brother... That is from Religion bro... Religion tries to control people... A relationship with Jesus is personal. I want people to know it though, so I won't be quiet. But if someone doesn't want it I'm still friends with them and we can hang out. I don't "force" it bro...
I'm gong to bible college to deepen my roots. The average person influences 10,000 people in their lives. What are u going to do with that influence? If I go back to fighting I don't want to be someone saying "I gotta give all the glory to mg Lord and Savior" and then that night be the drunken druggie... You gotta deepen the roots if you want to be standing even when the storms come... Because storms do come to everyone. Phone Post
IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII - I'll believe you're a good person when you start showing compassion to all creatures, not just people. Until then keep on keepin on mighty pig slayer. Phone Post
Lol! Yeah that was like a month into my faith... But I'm still a Viking :-) we ate em, and they died faster than any bullet except an immediate kill shot. Phone Post
Devereaux - justin, that statistic on influence is ridiculous. You don't need bible college. You need mushrooms.
That stat is ridiculous? You do some research brotha on that.... I've done plenty of shrooms, but not in a while. I saw the study. I u can't find it I will try to for you.
Also, whatever bitterness you have in you towards religion I'm sorry brotha... But don't let any bad apples who claim to be The people of God... keep you from finding out if there really is a God of the people. I did that for the longest time and realized it wasn't God hurting me... It wasn't that there was no God and these crazy controlling people were hurting me/freaking me out... It was that hurt people hurt people, people are jacked up... And they need the real deal, not the fake stuff... The authentic.
You really think this is all just chance? Your life is just random and virtually meaningless? Phone Post
Don’t you realize that in a race everyone runs, but only one person gets the prize? So run to win! All athletes are disciplined in their training. They do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize. So I run with purpose in every step. I am not just shadowboxing. I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should. Otherwise, I fear that after preaching to others I myself might be disqualified.
1 Corinthians 9:24-27 NLT Phone Post
Devereaux - If you accepted that life was indeed meaningless, perhaps you would relax a little and stop being so fucking weird.
Good response brotha... Our lives mean nothing. Now I remember what mindset led me down that dark path I went on. Phone Post
Devereaux - haha i just jerked off to gay porn, pray for me.
I've done that to porn to bro (just not gay porn, not my preference)... Tell u what, I'll pray for you but could you pray for me to? Phone Post
Devereaux - I just smoked some shit, can ya dig?
Indica or Sativa?
Two days ago I found myself in a grow room of MMJ and luckily my mom and Grandma were visiting me so it kept me extra accountable.. Yesterday I spoke at a drug rehab... Today I've been clean for quite a while thank God.
I'll pray for u like u asked. I could use some serious prayer to stay clean from porn and drugs bro. Thanks.
Member Since: 10/23/08
Dana, the fertittas and joe silva made an agreement at the meeting before the finale that whoever lost was gone. I lost a split and Madsen was pretty much booed out of the arena... It is what it is, and it's a reason I am a better man today. So it was disappointing, but I needed it. When/if I go back... I'll be 10x better and more ready (pyshically, mentally, & spiritually)
DallasVanWinkle - You know The Vikings were heathens and pagans right? And that Christianity was their ideological enemy?
You know I was a heathen and pagan right?
You know I was an enemy of God but He still loved me?
When we were utterly helpless, Christ came at just the right time and died for us sinners. Now, most people would not be willing to die for an upright person, though someone might perhaps be willing to die for a person who is especially good. But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners. And since we have been made right in God’s sight by the blood of Christ, he will certainly save us from God’s condemnation. For since our friendship with God was restored by the death of his Son while we were still his enemies, we will certainly be saved through the life of his Son. So now we can rejoice in our wonderful new relationship with God because our Lord Jesus Christ has made us friends of God. (Romans 5:6-11 NLT) Phone Post
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