MMA Predictions for 2013, Part I

Wednesday, January 02, 2013

Underground Blog Guest Blogger (UBGB) Jack Brown is “The Part-Time Martial Artist,” offering a full-time fan’s perspective on UFC and major MMA news, developments, or hypotheticals.

In his lastest Underground Blog, he details what fighters are on a collision course, who will be champion, and what veterans will find success in 2013.

It’s the beginning of the New Year and this is my last chance to prove to be a genius and/or an idiot when it comes to predicting what may happen in 2013.  Below are multiple categories (organized using past UFC event titles) for my predictions about some of MMA’s most talented individuals.  I may take some circuitous, yet creative, routes to get there, but it’s the results that matter.  This is part one.  You decide if part two is warranted.

“Collision Course” 
Though not currently scheduled to meet, the fighters fated to face each other in 2013:

Eddie Alvarez and Gilbert Melendez
Both fighters will eventually sign with the UFC.  They will welcome each other to the promotion with a number-one contender match-up.  Melendez will win.

Chael Sonnen and Nick Diaz
Both Sonnen and Diaz, after they lose against Jones and GSP, respectively, will be coming off of consecutive championship losses.  But since Chael knows where the money is at, he calls out an unsuspecting Diaz for a middleweight fight.  When Diaz does not initially agree to the fight, Chael threatens to call in some favors to end medical marijuana in California.  When this does not faze Diaz, Chael instead files federal legislation to eliminate 209 as a telephone area code.  Diaz is incensed and agrees to the fight.  The build-up is unbelievable, and the pay-per-view is the highest rated of the year.  In the end, however, Chael wins a very boring decision via takedowns and ground control.

Todd Duffee and Pat Barry and Rose Namajunas
Duffee vs. Barry will be scheduled to co-headline a FUEL TV card.  Namajunas will continue to build her reputation as a WMMA fighter by knocking out every opponent she faces in Invicta FC.  Barry will joke in pre-fight interviews that he’s soon going to be known only as Rose’s boyfriend.  Duffee will reluctantly participate in interviews as well.  However, he will be “misrepresented” and his words will be “misconstrued.”  As a result, an MMA blogger will quote Duffee as saying that, “Soon I will be Rose’s boyfriend.”  The drama then escalates, and after an injury to one of the fighters in the main event, Duffee vs. Barry is promoted to that spot.  The card becomes the best rated in FUEL TV history, and with Namajunas in his corner, Barry defeats Duffee via KO and makes an obscene gesture over Duffee’s prone body.  In a post-fight interview, Duffee laments in an aside that he doesn’t “get paid enough for this kind of treatment.”  Dana White then cuts Duffee for talking about money again.

“Only One Can Be Champion”
Those who will stand on top at the end of 2013:

Dana White or Scott Coker
Dana will begin the year by continuing to expand the UFC and TUF internationally, getting MMA legalized in NYC, and releasing more vlogs.  Coker will begin the year by cutting ties with Zuffa, sticking with Showtime and the Shamrock-Ranallo-Miletich triumvirate (threesome), and taking over the World Series of Fighting leadership from Ray Sefo.  This will lead to another promotional showdown between Dana and Coker.  And it will end in another UFC buyout and Coker returning to Zuffa to kiss the ring.

Jose Aldo or Renan Barao or Dominick Cruz
Aldo will retain the featherweight belt by beating Edgar.  Barao will retain the bantamweight belt by beating McDonald.  However, a practical joke, gone horribly wrong, at Nova Uniao practice, results in Aldo losing his ability to folliculate (have hair, body or otherwise).  Aldo swears vengeance upon Barao and relinquishes his title.  Aldo drops weight and faces Barao for the bantamweight title, in the main event of a UFC Brazil card held in a 100,000-seat soccer stadium.  The hairless Aldo easily evades Barao and retires his former friend with devastating kicks.  At the end of the year, Cruz has recovered from his injury and faces Aldo for the bantamweight belt.  The New Year’s Eve event is the first UFC held in Alaska.  Unfortunately for Aldo, the locale is too much of a disadvantage.  The frostbitten fighter loses by decision to the follicularly-gifted Cruz.

“Revenge of the Warriors”
The long-time veterans of the sport who will have the most success in 2013:

Vitor Belfort
Belfort will beat Bisping via brutal TKO, but he still isn’t given another title shot against Anderson as a result.  He is given Okami instead, and TKOs him as well.

Dan Henderson
Henderson beats Machida by decision.  He should be given the next title shot at 205, but events conspire to delay that fight yet again.

Josh Barnett
Barnett submits Nandor in the first round of the Strikeforce Finale.  He signs with the UFC after some initial contractual issues.  Barnett faces Frank Mir, in a match-up of former champs and highly skilled grapplers, and wins the fight via decision. 

Mark Hunt
Hunt KO’s Stefan Struve in the first round.  Afterward, fans from around the world clamor for Hunt to be considered for title contention.  The UFC gives him Rose’s boyfriend instead.  Hunt KOs Barry in the first round.  Fans then threaten to boycott all future UFC events unless Hunt is given a number-one contender match-up.  This will be the biggest UFC cliffhanger heading into 2014.

David Abbott
he second book in Tank’s “Bar Brawler” trilogy will be heralded by literary critics as a masterpiece of urban dysphoria.  Unfortunately, the novel’s villain bears an uncanny resemblance to a Mr. Scott Ferrozzo.  Legal proceedings ensue, but Abbott and Ferrozzo agree to have their case settled in a pay-per-view, backyard barbecue brawl.  The undercard, featuring Keith Hackney and Kimo Leopoldo, will be amazing, and so will Emmanuel Yarborough’s potato salad. 

Be on the lookout for MMA Predictions for 2013, Part II featuring the categories “Unfinished Business,” “Bad Intentions,” and “Payback,” and the fighters Nate Marquardt, Josh Koscheck, War Machine, Paul Daley, Phil Baroni, Andrei Arlovski, Tim Sylvia, Muhammed Lawal, Anthony Johnson, Quinton Jackson, Ronda Rousey, Miesha Tate, and many more.


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Thanks for reading,