Thursday, February 15, 2018

Devin Powell was selected by UFC president Dana White when the MMA boss went lookin’ for a fight in Bangor, Maine, and found an incredible one. The UFC lightweight regularly makes the trip south from Somersworth, NH to Lauzon MMA. The good news is there are more UFC fighters to train with there than anywhere in New England. Bad news is while Lauzon was executing a knee slide guard pass, something got stuck, or unstuck, and Powell’s nether region got stuck, or unstuck.

“Thanks to the fine ambulatory services in Wells, ME, I am checked into the hospital and ready for surgery,” Powell posted from a gurney, like a normal person. “Shout out to Joe Lauzon we’ve been practicing knees on the ground and he successfully ruptured my testicle with his sheer power. His opponent has no chance in April … now to get the blood clot drained and the goods repaired.”

Then Powell offered a powerful warning to everyone who trains.

“I waited a day and a half to be seen,” he explained. “Word for the wise, if you hurt yourself, go get checked out.”

Every gym has a horror story about someone who didn’t get an injured testicle checked out promptly. Think of a grapefruit. Listen to Powell’s advice. The fighter detailed to TMZ in painful detail what happened.

Powell lost a unanimous decision to Drakkar Klose in his league debut at UFC Fight Night 103 on January 15, 2017. Then he lost a split decision to Darrell Horcher at UFC Fight Night 112 on June 25. The BJJ black belt really wants another fight to show what he can do. He deserves it. And after a backstory incident like this, it would evil if he doesn’t get it and soon.

“Dana White, Sean Shelby how about a New York UFC fight coming up,” he wrote. “This will be quite the comeback story. Share this and help me get the ball rolling on my next fight and follow my journey… pun intended.”

Share this, for justice, for balls:

Like any normal person, Powell posted immediately post surgery as well.

“Surgery was a success, now on to recovery,” he wrote. “Can’t wait to get back in the UFC cage, this will be the first time since my last fight that I will be forced to rest my whole body for multiple days in a row. I will come back stronger than ever. I wasn’t expecting this curve ball but I’m going to hit my recovery right out of the park. I wear Diamond MMA every single fight and they are the absolute best in the business, I might need to start using them even when I grapple.”

For the record, Diamond MMA is the best cup imaginable, and absolutely would have protected Powell properly, had he been wearing one in practice.