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UnderGround Forums >> ATTN Tito!!! FUTA1! RED ALERT!!!!


8/29/13 11:59 PM
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RickStorm
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waiting for this glorious moment

and vtfu jupes

8/30/13 12:00 AM
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RickStorm
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for some reason I was called to the UG tonight.. Im not usally on at this time

8/30/13 12:01 AM
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lookoutawhale
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http://i.imgur.com/Srwrn5X.png

http://i.imgur.com/Srwrn5X.png

http://i.imgur.com/Srwrn5X.png

http://i.imgur.com/Srwrn5X.png

*drops mic on floor and walks off stage*

Im not making another post on this forum for at least another 24 hours. I dont want to blemish my post record. I want the whole world to see this. But i will lurk at the festivities and view the quad 8 dinner party.

 

Like Martin Luther King i had a dream! and that dream was to hit 8888 in this thread.

8/30/13 12:02 AM
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RickStorm
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Edited: 08/30/13 12:02 AM
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8/30/13 12:04 AM
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RickStorm
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*looks around*

nothing happening yet =(

8/30/13 12:30 AM
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KrzyBnzJnz
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*shotguns a beer*

8/30/13 12:37 AM
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2JupitersTooMany
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Woah Phone Post 3.0
8/30/13 12:37 AM
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2JupitersTooMany
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Synchronicity Phone Post 3.0
8/30/13 12:37 AM
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OzLoco
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I'm a slave to this thread.

~ Until Buffoonery.
8/30/13 12:39 AM
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2JupitersTooMany
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OzLoco - I'm a slave to this thread.

~ Until Buffoonery.
I can suspend you but cannot sign the cancelation agreement Phone Post 3.0
8/30/13 12:40 AM
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MountainMedic
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Sips PBR apprehensively Phone Post
8/30/13 12:42 AM
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OzLoco
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Edited: 08/30/13 12:43 AM
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...to my heart.
8/30/13 1:09 PM
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RickStorm
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Oh yeah!

Whale.. The email issue we talked about a year or so ago has been fixed =)

8/30/13 3:43 PM
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2JupitersTooMany
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Happy Titopendence Day

 

 

Eight years ago on this day, August 30, 2005, slavery was abolished in Futaville shortly after Tito Ortiz said at a Town Hall meeting, "I thought slavery was dead," which it wasn't, an oversight on the part of the City Planning Commission.  It was quite alive, an embarassing detail that required immediate correction in order to avoid humilation on the part of Tito Ortiz.

So on that day, slavery was killed completely dead in the entire world, except for in Tito Town, where slavery is encouraged and Tito is not allowed to conduct interviews.

 

 

8/30/13 3:51 PM
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2JupitersTooMany
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To commemorate the death of slavery almost everywhere, Tito graciously agreed to enslave himself to the last living relative of the founder of Futaville, the great Horace M. Stupidity.  And so it was that Tito, the free-est man in Futaville, symbolically gave himself over to the enslaving care of Ms. Edith Stupidity.

 

Tito Ortiz continues to be a slave to Stupidity today.

8/30/13 4:09 PM
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charms434
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At times like these, my brethren, I'm reminded of the ol Futaville Spirituals are forefathers sang. ...
AHEM...
Lead: Swing low, sweet chariot
Chorus: Coming for to carry Tito home
Lead: Swing low, sweet chariot
Chorus: Coming for to carry Tito home
Lead: If you get to Viacom before I do
Chorus: Coming for to carry Tito home
Lead: Tell Rampage, I’m coming too
Chorus: Coming for to carry Tito home...

Thank you Phone Post 3.0
8/30/13 5:05 PM
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2JupitersTooMany
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School Children Reinact "Dance of the Angry Wren" in Commemorative Musical

 

In honour of the Eighth Anniversary of Titopendence Day, the third grade class at Futaville Elementary performed the "Dance of the Angry Wren" to remember the uprising that followed Tito's comments at Town Hall. Tito was attacked from above by an especially angry Wren on his way to drink champagne from a crystaline goblet in the rear compartment of his Hummer limousine.

 

 

The well-traveled creature pecked Tito to Bolivian while an aftermarket stereo played a DMX remix of Go Down Moses.

8/30/13 5:06 PM
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RickStorm
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charms434 - At times like these, my brethren, I'm reminded of the ol Futaville Spirituals are forefathers sang. ...
AHEM...
Lead: Swing low, sweet chariot
Chorus: Coming for to carry Tito home
Lead: Swing low, sweet chariot
Chorus: Coming for to carry Tito home
Lead: If you get to Viacom before I do
Chorus: Coming for to carry Tito home
Lead: Tell Rampage, I’m coming too
Chorus: Coming for to carry Tito home...

Thank you Phone Post 3.0

lmao! is this real life!

well done charms

8/30/13 7:42 PM
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KevinMcAllister
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I clambered down the steps of the bus after a long and dreary night, highlighted by a sudden soaking by a motorist speeding through an oil-rainbow slicked puddle. My corduroy-velvet pants were soaked south of and including the tibia.

I let out a heavy sigh, and began my slow, methodical saunter towards my North York homestead. "Hey buddy!" - I turned quickly, "Tito?" I said without thinking, but alas, it was Terry the local vagrant, hoping to catch me for some spare change on my way past the Four Winds Grocer.

Hitting him crossed my mind. Not once, but multiple times. A thorough bludgeoning. "Don't you know I'm waiting for someone?" I managed to choke out. I could feel my rage bubbling to the surface, my hands clenched, knuckles whitened, ready to thrash poor Terry to within an inch of his miserable, urine soaked life. But I was able to contain myself "He doesn't understand", I told myself. "It's not his fault". I dug into my pocket, and pulled out a trio of lint-covered quarters and with a forced-smile I dropped them into Terry's dirty, grasping hands.

'Round the bend, I could see the door to my apartment. I took one last look behind, hoping to catch a glimpse of Him. Nothing. "I should have kicked Terry's ass", I mused to myself, feeling the same rejection I have felt since my 8th grade French teacher let my love go unrequited, while showering my friend Ray with sexual favours. "What does Ray have that I don't have Mdme. Pelissier?.......fuckin' Terry"

I stepped inside and realized I had dropped a crumpled sawbuck into Terry's hands, and with the last of my energy I rent and tore my Tito selfie poster and collapsed into a ball of misery. I repeated the name...Tito....Tito....Tito...Otit...until I fell asleep, soaked in oil-puddle and tears.

I awoke in the middle of the night with a cold chill, picked up my red washable crayola and x'd off another Friday on my endless advent calendar.

Until Tito
8/30/13 11:40 PM
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lookoutawhale
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and so i have returned. A full 24 hours after my self imposed exile.

In the meantime i held miltiary exercises on the dome of Futa and took care of party festivities in honour of the great Quad-ocho party we are having this evening.

Im looking around.. but it seems nothing changed.. I am perplexed. Surely hitting 8888 would have changed something..

*checks PM for congratulations from TIto*

... hmm nothing

*checks answering machine for a message left by Tito for the 8 accomplishment*

...hmm nothing there either..

I dont get it.. things were supposed to be different.. i spent my whole life getting to this quadruple 8 post count... as every thing been a waste? im not sure.. i was going to purchase another Wild 8's lottery ticket to mark the occasion.. but maybe my money is better spent purchasing Yukon Gold potatoes..

damn it Tito?

maybe Jenna said something about my post count on her twitter...

Tweets All / No replies

Keep talking about me and making me famous!

 
damn it.. still nothing..
8/30/13 11:41 PM
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lookoutawhale
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RickStorm - 

Oh yeah!

Whale.. The email issue we talked about a year or so ago has been fixed =)


oooh nice. thanks for the heads up rick. at least some good news even though Tito is a no show.

8/31/13 12:10 AM
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lookoutawhale
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*lights sparklers on Futapendence day*

*hands out candy to the neighbourhood wolves still lurking since the day of communism*

8/31/13 12:19 AM
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lookoutawhale
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*takes off pants and walks into a cabin nude and takes self portrait... a Titopendence tradition*

 

 

http://i.imgur.com/7S8e8ZF.jpg

 

 

 

8/31/13 12:24 AM
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2JupitersTooMany
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On Futapendence Day, a firecracker is a 23 year old red headed intern who has never waxed her butthole. Phone Post 3.0
8/31/13 12:40 AM
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lookoutawhale
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lets hope she doesnt shit out flames. it is a wood cabin after all...


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