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2/1/14 8:07 AM
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Grand master dave lang
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JBASS - So is messaging him on FB fair game? Phone Post 3.0
I think so and can't imagine anyone here would disagree Phone Post 3.0
2/1/14 9:42 AM
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billyball2
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jcblass - 
billyball2 - 
jcblass - Can someone kick this dude's ass already. We had a line out the door trying to get at Darrow. Multiple people almost fought him and one guy actually did...TWICE.

This Lang fuck is a pedophile out there "training" children. Frankly, I am shocked by 450 pages of bullshit and no action. Though a few of you have done a nice job of "exposing" him but it has not worked. What will work is a video of him being choked out or submitted. I am not asking for a drive by shooting, but this guy is out there, he attends seminars, he poses for pictures at tournaments, and is publicly accessible. Where are the UG'ers at!!

If this were a fake vet and this was a SEAL forum, and this much information existed on fake SEAL, the guy would be taken down.

Why don't you take care of it stud?

Most people don't want to go to jail for assault.

There's no way Lang will do a "friendly roll" with someone he doesn't know, and at this point there's no way he'll roll with a "new student" until enough time has passed that he's sure they're a noob.


Is James Funaro (sp) writing on the UG from jail?

I am just saying we had 10 people crawling the walls to get to Darrow, and we can't get anyone to approach this guy. Again, I am not saying "assault" him, but call him out at one of the 1000 tournaments he is photographed at. Perhaps go to one of the one thousand seminars he hosts and or attends. This guy is not a ghost.

Read the thread. Start from page 1.

Lang is a coward and will never roll, spar, workout, or do ANYTHING resembling a martial art unless he is absolutely sure there are no cameras around and his opponent is a noob.

Won't happen.
2/1/14 11:55 AM
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KuyaBJJ
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I decided to read the thread from the beginning. I’m only on page 90, but I’ve been matbattled about 6 times.
It amazes me how far back this goes and how deep the hole Lang has dug himself is. What amazes me more is the UG. I love how the UG mob rallies together from all over the world to address this. As a service member and martial artist I render a salute and deep bow.
For the white knight trying to save Tiphanie: I’ve had the opportunity to train with her when she came down during our belt testing with Master Traven. She had no mat etiquette whatsoever: addressing black belts by their first name, talking during technique. When it was time to drill, she would try and coach other people (higher ranking than her) in class. I asked the people that were there what she felt like rolling. No one had rolled with Tiphanie. A four striper (now blue) said in the middle of rolling, Tiphanie stopped rolling with whoever she was sparring with and came over to correct and coach her. The advice given from Tiphanie was horrible, and she was a white belt trying to coach a four striper and a purple belt rolling.
One thing Lang is doing for sure is building confidence. The sad thing is that it’s a false sense of security that may get them hurt. I would feel sorry for her. But after interacting with her, I don’t. She’s just as delusional as Lang.
I wish I had known about the UG before meeting them. I wouldn't have taken it so easy rolling with Lang.
2/1/14 12:55 PM
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NotRocky
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KuyaBJJ - 
I decided to read the thread from the beginning. I’m only on page 90, but I’ve been matbattled about 6 times.
It amazes me how far back this goes and how deep the hole Lang has dug himself is. What amazes me more is the UG. I love how the UG mob rallies together from all over the world to address this. As a service member and martial artist I render a salute and deep bow.
For the white knight trying to save Tiphanie: I’ve had the opportunity to train with her when she came down during our belt testing with Master Traven. She had no mat etiquette whatsoever: addressing black belts by their first name, talking during technique. When it was time to drill, she would try and coach other people (higher ranking than her) in class. I asked the people that were there what she felt like rolling. No one had rolled with Tiphanie. A four striper (now blue) said in the middle of rolling, Tiphanie stopped rolling with whoever she was sparring with and came over to correct and coach her. The advice given from Tiphanie was horrible, and she was a white belt trying to coach a four striper and a purple belt rolling.
One thing Lang is doing for sure is building confidence. The sad thing is that it’s a false sense of security that may get them hurt. I would feel sorry for her. But after interacting with her, I don’t. She’s just as delusional as Lang.
I wish I had known about the UG before meeting them. I wouldn't have taken it so easy rolling with Lang.

Funny thing, her FB background states "If you want to succeed in life kill your emotions." Looks to me that her and Dave sounds like two peas in a pod.
2/1/14 1:15 PM
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mk774
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mmaguy30 - HAHAHAHAHA


























HAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAHAHAHAHAHAH
















I GOT THE VIDEO OF DAVE AND TIPHANIE!!!!

















HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
























FUCK YOU LITTLE DICK LANG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!























HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH


this is gonna be epic... its uploading now.... give me 20 min...



Its amazing



LANG PORN!!!!

Dudes dick looks like a tic tac!

My god....
2/1/14 1:16 PM
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mk774
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KuyaBJJ - 
I decided to read the thread from the beginning. I’m only on page 90, but I’ve been matbattled about 6 times.
It amazes me how far back this goes and how deep the hole Lang has dug himself is. What amazes me more is the UG. I love how the UG mob rallies together from all over the world to address this. As a service member and martial artist I render a salute and deep bow.
For the white knight trying to save Tiphanie: I’ve had the opportunity to train with her when she came down during our belt testing with Master Traven. She had no mat etiquette whatsoever: addressing black belts by their first name, talking during technique. When it was time to drill, she would try and coach other people (higher ranking than her) in class. I asked the people that were there what she felt like rolling. No one had rolled with Tiphanie. A four striper (now blue) said in the middle of rolling, Tiphanie stopped rolling with whoever she was sparring with and came over to correct and coach her. The advice given from Tiphanie was horrible, and she was a white belt trying to coach a four striper and a purple belt rolling.
One thing Lang is doing for sure is building confidence. The sad thing is that it’s a false sense of security that may get them hurt. I would feel sorry for her. But after interacting with her, I don’t. She’s just as delusional as Lang.
I wish I had known about the UG before meeting them. I wouldn't have taken it so easy rolling with Lang.

I love how the amount of times you've been matbattled is the first thing you mention in this post (let us know what the final count is by the time you catch up). You're officially one of us now! hahaha
2/1/14 1:27 PM
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Little EagleYoshida
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mmaguy30 - 

AND HERE WE GO!!!! LANG-A-VISION PRESENTS: Dave & Tiphanie make a movie!!!

 


Why do I keep falling for this lol.
2/1/14 1:28 PM
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KuyaBJJ
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...7.

2/1/14 1:29 PM
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mk774
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mmaguy30 - 

AND HERE WE GO!!!! LANG-A-VISION PRESENTS: Dave & Tiphanie make a movie!!!

 


Godfuckingshitcockdamnit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2/1/14 1:31 PM
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Devin Ratray's gf, WOOF
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Member Since: 11/7/12
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mmaguy30 -

AND HERE WE GO!!!! LANG-A-VISION PRESENTS: Dave & Tiphanie make a movie!!!

 

Fuck. 3rd. Phone Post 3.0
2/1/14 1:43 PM
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Mr Bungle
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To those of you who fell for the Mattbattle:

Use Firefox with Adblock Plus, No Script, and Ghostery. That way you can just hover over an image or link and it will immediately tell you what the real address is.

Also, why WOULD you want to see Dave's sex tape? That's just fucked up. I'm sure mmaguy30 is SO Sorry to disappoint. Goons.
2/1/14 1:43 PM
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MrAntichrist
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Goddamn you Phone Post 3.0
2/1/14 1:43 PM
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Mr Bungle
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mmaguy30 - I am a fucking god.

Bahahahahahaha!!!!!111!1!!11!!!!1!!!111!111!1!!
2/1/14 2:35 PM
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BriggsSeekins
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I have been pretty good about avoiding Matt Battle since the early days of the thread, but that's the second time in a few months MotherfuckingMAGuy has got me. I don't remember what the other one was, but it was something else so good I couldn't think before clicking and it was on a work computer.

2/1/14 2:53 PM
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McSurly
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mmaguy30 - I seriously think it should be an OG rule that you have to post if you got matbattled...

but post something good, like a pic of a hot chick or something...


these threads would be infinitely better...
You son of a bitch. Got me.

Now I have all these strange new feeling and desires....wanna roll? Phone Post 3.0
2/1/14 3:18 PM
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Caladan
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Edited: 02/01/14 3:18 PM
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Goddamnit. Mmaguy should have to drop the nuke news to make up for that one.
2/1/14 3:36 PM
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UGPTT__IeatCOCKSforBreakfastAwYeah
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I've only been Matt battled once and it wasn't even in this thread. I have read this whole thread front to back without getting Matt battled. Pretty crazy odds lol.
2/1/14 4:04 PM
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Mil Mascaras
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mmaguy30 - I am a fucking god.

Damn. Got me! It's been over a year since I've been fooled.
2/1/14 4:05 PM
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Bisping=Gatekeeper4Life
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( . Y . )
) (
( v )

Mattbattled Phone Post 3.0
2/1/14 4:06 PM
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Bisping=Gatekeeper4Life
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Ahh fuch, it looked better when I typed it up Phone Post 3.0
2/1/14 4:58 PM
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hmeboy
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Mr Bungle - To those of you who fell for the Mattbattle:

Use Firefox with Adblock Plus, No Script, and Ghostery. That way you can just hover over an image or link and it will immediately tell you what the real address is.

Also, why WOULD you want to see Dave's sex tape? That's just fucked up. I'm sure mmaguy30 is SO Sorry to disappoint. Goons.

Why? Well what else am I gonna fap to?
2/1/14 5:03 PM
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Jessy30
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Member Since: 9/28/10
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mmaguy30 -

AND HERE WE GO!!!! LANG-A-VISION PRESENTS: Dave & Tiphanie make a movie!!!

 

FUCK! First time in 3.5 yrs! Phone Post 3.0
2/1/14 6:05 PM
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Jack_Bauer
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Member Since: 4/13/11
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get ya tits out - whats all this "in early" and VU shit? sounds like a bunch a highschool girls in this place

Did this line seriously come from a member with the name "get ya tits out"?

2/1/14 6:07 PM
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Grapple_Tackle
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Jessy30 -
mmaguy30 -

AND HERE WE GO!!!! LANG-A-VISION PRESENTS: Dave & Tiphanie make a movie!!!

 

FUCK! First time in 3.5 yrs! Phone Post 3.0
As soon as I clicked it, it was loading and I was like .."fuck". Phone Post 3.0
2/1/14 6:09 PM
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Jack_Bauer
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Edited: 02/01/14 6:29 PM
Member Since: 4/13/11
Posts: 1307
itswhitty - 
Mr Bungle - Actually, that tats not even close to what I have in that FNM pic.
That looks more like the Star of David, which seems even weirder if indeed he was in a Christian Metal band.

The Star of David is a stranger choice still because Jews are forbidden to get tattoos.

Really hard to understand what was going through his head, but he may have gotten it before he ever had an inkling of this BJJ fantasy.

I'm picturing this: he hears that Jews tend to be successful and well-respected, so he gets an idea. Overnight, he brands himself Jewish and waits for the perks to roll in. The Jews, being a pretty wily bunch, know he's full of shit and will have nothing to do with him. Dave realizes that it's going to take a lot to impress them and be welcomed into their group. He briefly considers the investment of years of studying the Torah, forming a relationship with a rabbi, and taking steps toward being embraced by a community that is notoriously difficult for outsiders to join.

Then the light turns green and he snaps to and starts heading down the road. Still dreaming of Jew gold, something catches his eye -- a tattoo parlor! It's brilliant. He'd gone to temple twice, and both times he'd been struck by the lack of enthusiasm among the adherents. No flashy Jew-crosses or whatever, no tattoos of favorite scriptures... This was his chance to prove that he was the most hardcore Jew in town. Once they saw that he was the first in the congregation willing to get inked up for god they'd have to accept him, right?

Well, let's just say that it was such a bad idea that telling people he was in a Christian rock band seemed like a step up afterward...

(And again, this is fiction.)

 

The Star of David Lang?

 


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