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Hunting & Fishing Ground >> One-man UG knife hunt inspired by "the Viking"

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3/26/11 4:28 PM
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Masakatsu Funaki
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Edited: 03/26/11 4:34 PM
Member Since: 11/6/10
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 First of all, I want to do two things: preemptively apologize for the length of this post and pay homage to Justin Wren's thread that compelled me to go out and do this...

http://www.mixedmartialarts.com/mma.cfm?go=forum.posts&thread=1763233&page=1

That being said and done, I'll get started.


After reading about Justin “the Viking” Wren’s expedition to Texas to hunt for wild boar with a knife  just two months ago, I decided I was going to do the same thing. Justin was good enough to send me his email address and I shot him two emails asking him to let me know whether he was still interested in going on a UG trip. I didn’t get a response from Justin to either one but still inspired by his expedition, I decided it was time to forge off on my own. I just left the military and got a good job in DC, so once that first paycheck rolled in, it was go time.

I flew down to Fort Lauderdale, FL last weekend. I had talked with a guide service (one of only about 4-5 in the U.S. that I could track down that offered knife hunts because of the danger/liability) down around Lake Okeechobee, which is right on the outskirts of the Everglades. They own a huge area of private land. In Florida, because the wild boars/hogs are such a nuisance and so destructive, you don’t have to actually have a permit or license to hunt if you’re on someone’s land. Two guides agreed to meet me on Saturday morning and take me out on their land.

After flying in to Fort Lauderdale, I spent the night in the South Beach area…which is a helluva place, let me tell you. Next morning, I woke up early and put a sweater on (in case one of the "tusks" snagged my arm) and decided to forego my idea to tape my iPhone to my forehead and Yugi Shimada the entire hunt (sorry, guys!). After that, I drove over to the meeting site. I had to take a few weird turns on dirt roads and eventually reached the area the guides wanted me to meet them at. They were late…and I wasn’t sure if I was in the right place. I waited for a while, and noticed that a few hundred yards away was a old house. I walked up to it, ready to knock on the door, and heard “You motha f****er, I swear to God, I’m gonna KILL YOU!” being screamed at the top of someone’s lungs. Some similar yelling went on for another 15 secs or so.

Obviously, I have hunting and knives and that sort of thing on my mind, and I’m in the middle of nowhere in the Everglades, and it sounds like someone’s going to be brutalized in this cinderblock house. So I do a fairly stupid thing; I knock on the door. A little Cuban girl answers the door and opens it wide. There’s a family of Cuban guys who are playing a quite competitive game of Call of Duty with each other. I start laughing and they ask me if I’m here to hunt and let me know that the guides brought another hunter on a gator hunt and will be right back.

I wait patiently outside. The gator hunt party returns with a 7’7” alligator. The hunter and I talk for a little while…he’s from Maryland and has been hunting for years. He asks me what I’m doing here and I tell him “trying to hunt for wild boar”. He then asks me what type of firearm I’m using and I reply with “just my K-bar knife”. I get a look of surprise and then he says, “You’re fucking insane!”

At this point, talking to a very seasoned hunter when I’ve never done anything outside of watching other people shoot Elk, I’m starting to think he’s right. Maybe this is dumb. I sign my life away on a waiver as a few of the guides laugh and make jokes about hunting with a knife. When they were coming back from the alligator hunt, they came across an enormous 250lb boar and they want to take me back to that area to see if I can get it. “I hope you’re damn light on your feet…don’t worry, we’ve only had a few people that were torn up by these guys, but they were using spears. It’s a little more dangerous with a knife” one of the guides laughs as he takes a gulp of his Bud Light.

So two guides, myself, and 4 cur dogs (looked like part Pitbull-Lab-God knows what else) hop onto what appears to be a modified monster truck with a flat platform that has pens for the dogs and seats for us up top.

We take off into the midst of the undergrowth dodging through thickets and growth for a few minutes while these guys decide to suddenly give me a 10 second crash course on what to actually do: “Get yer ass up on the side of the boar and try to stab up under the armpit. Some boars have this there natural shield of like bone to protect those organs so a knife may get stuck up in there and that’s not good. Some guys stab once or twice. That ain’t good either. The boar’s gonna turn and rip ya. You have to start and then keep on stabbing once the dogs bay the boar and keep it distracted.”

Literally a few seconds later, while I’m trying to mentally picture what I’m going to do and am still digesting the directions, the dogs, who had already jumped off of the platform monster truck, start barking like crazy. A split second went by, and suddenly this black boar jets it from out of the woods to within 10 feet of me as if flys by with the dogs behind it!

I take off running after the boar and the dogs. The boar is letting out some bloodcurling screams and finally the dogs bay it in a thicket. As I run up to the group, I look back, and the guides aren’t with me! They are still trying to turn the truck around to get to my direction (they weren’t in the best shape, methinks). They start screaming out from about 60-70 yards away, “Get it before it hurts the dogs!!”.  I was hoping for a little backup in case the boar went feral on my ass, but it looked like this wasn’t gonna happen.

The boar is biting two dogs on the snout and I'm able to sneak up to the right side. I jab the knife into the boar’s side near the armpit and suddenly, this thing flips its head toward me, mouth open. Without thinking, I grab its left ear and then keep going with the knife. The boar seems to fall so I let up. Suddenly, the boar gets back on its legs and goes after another dog. At this point, I pushed it on its right side and I put it out completely with some stabbing to the left side as it lay flat. It wasn’t the 250-lb’er, but it was a decent size.

Killing an animal was a strange experience. Especially with a struggle like that. I wasn’t sure exactly how I’d feel about it and no doubt, I did feel what I guess I could label as some remorse. What was I doing here, in the middle of the Everglades in Florida, hunting a wild boar with two strange men and a knife?

I realize that the boar isn’t a human. But it was a living thing that was going about its business in the woods, foraging for food, when I came along with a few dogs and ended its life. I was so wrapped up with my thoughts about staying safe beforehand that I hadn’t even taken any time to think about this part of it. So at that point, I did.

continued below...

 

 
3/26/11 4:30 PM
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Masakatsu Funaki
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Edited: 03/26/11 5:17 PM
Member Since: 11/6/10
Posts: 239

What I came up with was a question and an answer. Why did I want to go on this hunt? What compelled me to fly from DC to the Everglades for this? The answer is that I felt I needed to test myself. I feel that a man tests his manhood in various ways – fighting, comparing “female conquests”, playing sports, and in general, doing things that allow him to feel as if he is capable of being entirely self-sufficient. Especially in the world we live in where you can go to a Safeway and purchase anything you need to survive off of. Every week, families go to the store and buy ground beef that is made from cows who are electrocuted, killed, and butchered by men whom the everyday shopper is indirectly paying to kill for them.

 

I wanted to challenge myself. One of the reasons that I haven’t hunted in the past, despite being proficient in weapons from my time in the military and having friends who hunted, was because I didn’t see the allure of shooting an animal from far away when there was no danger involved. In this case, the odds were leveled a bit. The boar had a chance to harm me; to fight back. It felt more real and I had to face the animal while it was dying.

As we headed back with the dogs, I realized that I was going to make sure that this meat didn’t go to waste. I had personally taken an animal’s life. That in mind, in the end, with the grill fired up and ready to go, I enjoyed the best and most meaningful meal I’ve ever tasted.

Overall, it was a challenge that I’d recommend to those who hunt or eat meat. At the same time, I can understand the perspective of anyone who thinks that this is a very unusual thing to do.

I know that Justin and Shane Carwin were planning on going in the future and I figure that they’re understandably pretty busy now. I would like to make the trip again sometime, hopefully with these guys and some other fighters and UGers. I know many of you would probably get something out of the experience that forces you to put yourself at risk and also ask yourself some serious and pointed questions.

 

***Sorry the guts in this picture…I accidentally went a little too low at the end when I was making sure the boar was down and out.***





   
3/26/11 4:35 PM
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crowbar
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 Looks like the dogs bit the shit out of it.
3/26/11 4:42 PM
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Alger Hiss
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Great post. I agree, everyone who eats meat should do this, or something like it.
3/26/11 5:00 PM
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Fake Rassler
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LOL gj conan, looks like the riddle of steel has been answered. could you have been any more high when you wrote that post?
3/26/11 5:13 PM
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ruger007
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10ers going to 10! ^^^
3/26/11 5:14 PM
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MTomlinson
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 cool experience man,

respect for stepping outside your box to go through with it
3/26/11 5:20 PM
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Savron
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why is this shite on the UG

Hunting HE-MAN stories should be on the OG

ya sicko fucks

use a gun
3/26/11 5:26 PM
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crowbar
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 "I think he stabbed the shit out of it."

I was under the impression that a hunter just stabbed the hog in the throat.After watching some Youtube videos,I found out that this was not the case.
3/26/11 5:32 PM
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doctorbrodsky
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Hunting with any weapon = pussy

Please go hunt tigers barehanded.
3/30/11 6:05 PM
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Edelweiss
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Nice my fren. TTT for later
3/30/11 6:09 PM
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chris curry
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crowbar -  Looks like the dogs bit the shit out of it.

i took one of theese hunting trips for wild bore,our guide had like 10 dogs and they pinned the bore in a corner and attacked the shit out of it then he looked at me and said "you paid for this trip so you wanna knife it"

fucking rednecks
3/30/11 6:12 PM
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voorhees
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Rifle,shotgun,and bowhunting is awesome.

Fishing is too.

I do them every chance I get.

But knife hunting and spearing is a bit much IMO.
3/30/11 6:16 PM
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chris curry
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voorhees - Rifle,shotgun,and bowhunting is awesome.

Fishing is too.

I do them every chance I get.

But knife hunting and spearing is a bit much IMO.



all hunting is great. If you actually hunt the animal having a dog track it is far from hunting.


i love when gun season starts in my state,nothing better then pulling out the bushmaster and taking out a deer from a few hundred yards
3/30/11 6:37 PM
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Attdude
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Awesome! I think you should have went for the 250lb monster...
3/30/11 6:53 PM
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fingers 'n' teeth
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Great story

LOL @ the responses.

This place is never satisfied. You shoot something your a pussy.
You go out and kill something with an 8 inch knife and its not humane.


3/30/11 6:57 PM
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Fake Rassler
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fingers 'n' teeth - Great story

LOL @ the responses.

This place is never satisfied. You shoot something your a pussy.
You go out and kill something with an 8 inch knife and its not humane.


lol yeah your only choice is to be a coward who never knew what it was to truly be alive OR to stab a pig in a heavily assisted environment where your likelihood of being injured is/was almost zero. EVERY MAN DIES BUT NOT EVERY MAN REALLY LIVES
3/31/11 12:31 AM
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Edelweiss
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Nice story bud. I understand what you were thinking as you killed it. I feel remorse every single time I take an animals life. There are few things more delicious than a meal that is well-earned though. Thanks for sharing.

I'll go with you guys in ten years when I'm done with med school and actually have some money. ha!
3/31/11 7:52 PM
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Edelweiss
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Sorry, that sounded like I was already in med school. I'm a senior undergrad student still.
4/1/11 6:45 AM
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Byrd
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I AM A MOFO - 
ruger007 - 10ers going to 10! ^^^



Idiots gonna parrot old lines instead of saying something meaningful!


10ers still 10in.
4/1/11 5:45 PM
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Edelweiss
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I'm a non-traditional student. I owned a business before returning to college to finish my goal of becoming a doctor. So, while I am a senior, I am a little behind where I should be. I take the MCAT soooon, and then I'll interview for schools. I'm just finishing up my personal statement. My ultimate goal is to get into the University of Wisconsin's program. I want to specialize in pediatrics because kids are amazing. I'm also considering dermatology so I can have a life. I'm really open and thoroughly enjoy most aspects of medicine.

You must be in the medical field, doing the same thing as me, or trying to steal my identity? haha.
4/2/11 1:39 PM
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Masakatsu Funaki
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Edited: 04/02/11 1:47 PM
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Bawls - 
Masakatsu Funaki -

As we headed back with the dogs, I realized that I was going to make sure that this meat didn’t go to waste. I had personally taken an animal’s life. That in mind, in the end, with the grill fired up and ready to go, I enjoyed the best and most meaningful meal I’ve ever tasted.
 
There's your answer as to why you hunt. If you weren't conflicted killing an animal, you wouldn't be human. Once you reflect and eat the animal, you understand the purpose.

I've been waiting for a follow up.. Awesome story - glad it went well.

 Thanks, Bawls and Edelweiss and everyone else. I actually wasn't even going to post this story until Bawls TTT'd the other thread to remind me. Glad you guys enjoyed it! 
4/4/11 10:08 PM
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Dolfan
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ttt... Cool Hunt. 


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