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Hawai'i Underground >> Your girl wants to know about your sexual history

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9/4/12 7:14 PM
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JIMMYNAKS
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Tell her or keep your mouth shut?

If you've banged preggos, fat black chicks in nasty drunken 3somes, and midgets... Well technically a Dwarf, I suggest you keep your mouth shut. You'll thank me later.

Hypothetically speaking of course. Phone Post
9/4/12 8:50 PM
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JIMMYNAKS
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while I'm at it guys, for Crom's sake..... don't ask about hers either. you think you want to know but you really don't.

Thank me later.
9/4/12 9:46 PM
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Sgt. Slaphead
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a relationship is built on trust and understanding.....how she gonna trust you when you say "don't worry, it'll feel good eventually" and understand you need to do kinky shit if you don't share?

just don't share the stuff about our panel van and duct tape adventures!
9/4/12 10:28 PM
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FCTV808
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it depends on what she wants to become.
9/5/12 2:22 AM
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fnunderful
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i'm sorry, but the only story i have about my dick looking huge is the one that INCLUDES a midget (an actual midget, not a freaky sausage fingered dwarf)! I tell that one all day!
9/5/12 3:06 AM
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JIMMYNAKS
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I hear from countless guys either upset about something they heard from their gf or wife about her past or guys in trouble after answering a question about their own past.

keep your mouth shut Morans!

Unless you're Funderful and have a cool midget story.
9/5/12 3:13 AM
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fnunderful
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problem number one...they really listen to what she has to say. Just smile and nod. It works!
9/5/12 3:58 AM
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ChinoV
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Some shit your better off not knowing. Plead the fifff!!!!
9/5/12 4:37 AM
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Matt Phillips
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Edited: 09/05/12 4:38 AM
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 Im pretty sure my wife has had more pipe in her than a Super Mario Game, but I sure as hell dont want to know how many times she's eaten the mushroom. Ya dig? 


*Edit*

She's not getting my roster either, simply because I dont know half the names on it. 
9/5/12 5:02 AM
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FCTV808
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the minute i find out. disposable they become. somehow they don't like that.
9/5/12 6:32 AM
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Moke
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Edited: 09/05/12 6:32 AM
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Nakster is correct. No matter how chill they seem about that kinda thing, as soon as they start getting a good picture of your past, they'll start freaking the fuck out. When they say they are totally cool about that kinda thing, they are LYING to get you to talk...in fact any time their mouths are moving they are lying.
9/5/12 6:36 AM
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Moke
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Personally, I on the other hand don't give a shit...Oh you're a stripper? Cool. Oh you're a virgin? Rad. Oh you just got divorced? Get naked. Oh you're thinking of starting jiu jitsu? I'll take that as a come-on. Private lesson start in my bedroom in five minutes.
9/5/12 10:00 AM
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UGCTT_buchu8oolong
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Neva called me,

Signed midget. Phone Post
9/5/12 12:08 PM
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fnunderful
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UGCTT_buchu8oolong -  Neva called me,

Signed midget. Phone Post

midget, your english is much better than I remember...but who knows, it was about 13 years ago.
9/5/12 12:57 PM
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JIMMYNAKS
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Moke - Nakster is correct. No matter how chill they seem about that kinda thing, as soon as they start getting a good picture of your past, they'll start freaking the fuck out. When they say they are totally cool about that kinda thing, they are LYING to get you to talk...in fact any time their mouths are moving they are lying.
This Phone Post
9/5/12 12:58 PM
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JIMMYNAKS
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What's better than midget sex? Underage midget sex! Haha! Just kidding. That's gross...... Unless the rest of you are cool with it? Phone Post
9/5/12 1:23 PM
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FCTV808
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i would think midget sex feels like bull dog sex? which is of course disgusting. right?
9/5/12 8:36 PM
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Dr. Shocker
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JIMMYNAKS -  What's better than midget sex? Underage midget sex! Haha! Just kidding. That's gross...... Unless the rest of you are cool with it? Phone Post

LMAO!

Unless the rest of you AREN'T cool with it.
9/6/12 6:58 AM
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MOB U2
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Matt Phillips -  Im pretty sure my wife has had more pipe in her than a Super Mario Game, but I sure as hell dont want to know how many times she's eaten the mushroom. Ya dig? 


*Edit*

She's not getting my roster either, simply because I dont know half the names on it. 

That analogy was pure beauty. If I use it one day I will call it the MattPhilipps analogy.
9/6/12 7:05 AM
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MOB U2
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I told my wife of this girl that had me as her booty call. She must've not been listening and was thinking this was like a high school petting relationship b/c she asked me once if I slept with her.

I said, "HELL YEAH I DID."

Which was bad b/c I mentioned I bumped into her several times recently. Last time I was actually talking to her husband quite a bit. He don't know about me though. I feel like if she didn't have kids, things could've worked out, and I could've done more kinkier shit with her like giving her the David Carradine treatment and doing a menage with her and her lesbo friends (the freakiest girl I ever had). But I feel like she settled for the stable guy to take care of her kids and that's why she stopped calling me.

I'm still kinda sad about it. I know for sure she would've let me fulfill my Makita fantasies.
9/7/12 4:17 AM
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JIMMYNAKS
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Ah.... When I think of all the girls I should have fugged when I had the chance instead of being a good guy, I kick myself in the dick and shit on my balls. Phone Post
9/7/12 4:23 AM
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FCTV808
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JIMMYNAKS -  Ah.... When I think of all the girls I should have fugged when I had the chance instead of being a good guy, I kick myself in the dick and shit on my balls. Phone Post


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