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S&C UnderGround >> Funny things I see at the gym


11/20/12 12:03 PM
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Sequoyah Sandford
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The other day there was this fella standing on a medicine ball doing these strange arm movements that I assumed worked the shoulders. He was dressed like a person from an 80s aerobic video. If he fell it wouldve been a bad day for him.

What are somethings that you have seen recently? Phone Post
11/20/12 12:16 PM
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5pointer
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i seen a really overweight woman on the seated ab crunch pushing the 2 handles using only her arms.. no ab contracting at all.

i see dudes all the time benching on the smith machines turned the wrong way so everyone n the gym can see their junk.

i seen a young teenage kid attemtping to curl somehow on the smith machine.

theres has been so many more, these r just recent. im a member at planet fitness so i see bizzare stuff all the time as its not a gym that serious lifters attend.
11/20/12 2:41 PM
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NeoSpartan
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- Trainer teaching an overweight woman to do overhead squats on a physio/rehab ball (the 1/2 ball 1/2 flat surface one). I'm a bit cruel so I was waiting for someone to fall.

- Homeless guy that sleeps on the bench next to the jacuzzi. No idea how tf he gets in the gym. I used to avoid him turns out he's a nice guy actually. I tend to swim really late (around midnight) so lately sometimes he counts laps for me. Hopefully he doesnt kill me he is a little 'off'.

- 2 guys blowing each other (69) in the sauna (seriously don't go to a 24 hr gym past midnight)


- Dude that trains with a teenager that's obviously not his son (racially anyway). Not necessarily weird because it could be his stepkid. But what is weird about it is they wear matching outfits. same shoes same socks same gloves.


- My punk-ass using a neck harness between sets. What you doing queer? Looks like you're practicing for BJ marathon!
11/20/12 2:42 PM
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NeoSpartan
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forgot to add the bit about the trainer spotting the woman by holding onto her lats. I was waiting for her hands to slip, tickle the woman, and all 3 come tumbling down.

11/20/12 3:36 PM
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5pointer
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u have to be kidding about the oral activity in the sauna.
11/21/12 3:14 PM
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NeoSpartan
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100% Serious. I don't require much sleep and swimming doesnt take much out of me (if I eat a lot) so sometimes i'll go fit in some technique work just to use my time well.

I was done swimming and the jacuzzi was being fixed so I decided to kick it in the sauna to gather myself before I showered and left.

Well I walked in on two guys laying on the benches full on gagging each other out. Never even glanced in the direction of the sauna again.

If you're ever bored some night. Check out the Casual encounters section in your area. You'll probably see some people trying to link up so they can fuck in the gym.


I've banged a few chicks in the gym (not the same one mind you mostly in college, Fight On USC! hah) so I don't blame anyone. but the two guys blowing each other thing was like accidentally having a gay vid come up in your redtube search. Pretty bewildering.
11/21/12 3:22 PM
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dizz
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Would have paid money to see your reaction to that

I'm terrified of the sauna at the gym for that very reason and have never gone in

11/21/12 6:25 PM
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NeoSpartan
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a) http://i.imgur.com/GBYaA.gif

+

b) http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m1j4qpQnIt1r5psdp.gif

+

c) http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mdg7e6HF9G1r78c8u.gif

=

D) http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ma5k4v0Avd1rtej2p.gif
11/21/12 10:13 PM
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MixedMartialTart
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You see a lot of squatting with 1/100 range of motion. Phone Post
11/21/12 10:41 PM
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Predator Pierre
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I watched a man in his 50s do atleast 10 minutes of shadow boxing.. with very poor technique and he would pause every few minutes to get his breathe back then carry on.. I didn't see him do any other exercises thinking about it. Phone Post
11/22/12 4:24 PM
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Sequoyah Sandford
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NeoSpartan - 100% Serious. I don't require much sleep and swimming doesnt take much out of me (if I eat a lot) so sometimes i'll go fit in some technique work just to use my time well.

I was done swimming and the jacuzzi was being fixed so I decided to kick it in the sauna to gather myself before I showered and left.

Well I walked in on two guys laying on the benches full on gagging each other out. Never even glanced in the direction of the sauna again.

If you're ever bored some night. Check out the Casual encounters section in your area. You'll probably see some people trying to link up so they can fuck in the gym.


I've banged a few chicks in the gym (not the same one mind you mostly in college, Fight On USC! hah) so I don't blame anyone. but the two guys blowing each other thing was like accidentally having a gay vid come up in your redtube search. Pretty bewildering.
That is horrible haha Phone Post
11/22/12 8:32 PM
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James Foy
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Predator Pierre -  I watched a man in his 50s do atleast 10 minutes of shadow boxing.. with very poor technique and he would pause every few minutes to get his breathe back then carry on.. I didn't see him do any other exercises thinking about it. Phone Post

I just checked out a new gym near my work yesterday and, no bullshit, a guy was standing DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF THE DUMBELL RACK shadow boxing his ass off.

I'm talking about real fuckin deal shadow boxing though, not just some 1-2's. Fucking 5-6 punch combos with level changes for takedowns and the whole 9 yards.

Of course his form was terrible and he was wearing fucking lifting gloves... sigh...
11/24/12 3:38 PM
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WhiteDynamite
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I used to work out at a locally owned gym. It was always slow in there on Sundays so sometimes I would take my daughter and we'd run around on the basketball court - kick a ball around, shoot hoops, whatever.

There was a little skinny Asian guy, I'd say early 20's, that I saw in there occasionally. He happened to be there on this particular day. The doorway to the weight room was right off of the basketball court. So my little girl kicks a ball and it rolls over by the door. When she goes to get the ball she peeks into the door and freezes. She turns to me all big-eyed, with a funny look on her face. A smile slowly grows and she quietly waves me to come over.

I make my way over and, using my ninja-like stealth, look into the weight room to see this kid standing about six inches from the mirror. He's talking to himself and gesturing, but not in a "psych up" kind of way you'd expect to see in a gym. This kid was giving himself the bedroom eyes. I watch for about 5 seconds, then he makes his move. He slowly leans in, closes his eyes, and starts making out with the mirror. When I say "making out" I don't mean a little smooch, maybe a peck on the cheek. No. I'm talking full on make out - tongue involved, slobber on the mirror, the whole thing. He was going to town.

It was a struggle to not bust up laughing. I just stood there watching trying my hardest to contain myself. So he pulls away from the mirror, slowly opens his eyes, and sees me. He instantly gets a look on his face like he just shit himself. He turns quickly, grabs his keys off the top of the stereo, and storms out of the emergency exit.

I never saw him again after that. I kind of feel like I cockblocked him from himself.

11/24/12 9:46 PM
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Kway
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11/25/12 12:34 PM
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None So Blind
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The biggest thread on Rippetoe's forum is essentially "Weird shit you've seen in the gym." Over a thousand pages, and some genuinely funny shit in the first 300 or so (which is all I've read so far...)

http://startingstrength.com/resources/forum/showthread.php?t=14425
11/25/12 4:42 PM
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molsonman
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Can someone critique my floor press form?

 

11/25/12 4:44 PM
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GSPGOAT331
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I have to see this at the gym a few times a week

11/26/12 1:19 PM
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Taku
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When you have been in the fitness biz as long as I have, you eventually see everything.
 
I've seen guys wearing headphone who sound like the soundtrack to a 1970's Kung Fu movie as they scream and Ki- Yai their way through every set.
 
I've seen guys wearing the smallest tank-tops and the shortest Shorty-shorts (think Dolphin running shorts) who were so completely covered in body hair that they looked like a Wookie...And they stroll around with the invisible LATS syndrome.
 
I've run into guys that have such bad B.O,. that it could stink up an entire indoor basketball court single handed.
 
I’ve seen women with breasts the size of basketballs (not exaggerating) doing squats, and screaming like they were having an orgasm as they stood up from each rep... 
 
I am at work right now...about 10 feet from where I am typing there is a guy doing "cable rows"... He is a big, strong guy, probably about 6'-4" and at least 230 lbs. His form is the worst. He is using the entire stack on the machine and throwing his body back and forth to get the weight to move. He does this on every set of every exercise. If he was to use good form, he would be lucky to get 1/2 the stack to move.
 
What will I see in the next few hours?

TAKU

11/26/12 3:09 PM
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Sequoyah Sandford
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Taku - 
When you have been in the fitness biz as long as I have, you eventually see everything.
 
I've seen guys wearing headphone who sound like the soundtrack to a 1970's Kung Fu movie as they scream and Ki- Yai their way through every set.
 
I've seen guys wearing the smallest tank-tops and the shortest Shorty-shorts (think Dolphin running shorts) who were so completely covered in body hair that they looked like a Wookie...And they stroll around with the invisible LATS syndrome.
 
I've run into guys that have such bad B.O,. that it could stink up an entire indoor basketball court single handed.
 
I’ve seen women with breasts the size of basketballs (not exaggerating) doing squats, and screaming like they were having an orgasm as they stood up from each rep... 
 
I am at work right now...about 10 feet from where I am typing there is a guy doing "cable rows"... He is a big, strong guy, probably about 6'-4" and at least 230 lbs. His form is the worst. He is using the entire stack on the machine and throwing his body back and forth to get the weight to move. He does this on every set of every exercise. If he was to use good form, he would be lucky to get 1/2 the stack to move.
 
What will I see in the next few hours?

TAKU


Today I seen a guy on the smith machine doing all sorts of stuff wearing running shorts from the 80's. Do you really need shorts that short to work out??? lol
11/26/12 3:34 PM
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None So Blind
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I have seen the chicks who make orgasm sounds during squatting. Perhaps surprisingly, they have almost always been fairly hot.

As such, they interfere with one's concentration in the WORST way :-P
11/26/12 8:43 PM
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OregonChaelClosedDueToBandWagonCrash
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Smith machine bicep curls always make me chuckle Phone Post
11/27/12 10:27 PM
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1armedScissor
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For many reasons I've stopped working out at "chain" gyms and have been working out at community centers and college campuses for the past 5 or so years. Both are either free or ridiculously cheap. Now you don't get all the bells and whistles you get a the chain gyms but the price alone more than makes up the difference.

I've seen some fucked up shit in these "free" gyms. They are typically located near halfway houses/methadone clinics, etc... and there isn't really any criteria for who can come. Unless you are physically assaulting people you are welcome. That's cool and I agree with it, fitness should not be just for the rich. But there are some times when these "free" places need to draw the lines. (more coming...)
11/27/12 10:36 PM
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1armedScissor
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first problem I had with the "free" gym...

Probably on my second or third visit I walk into the change room (which also has an exit/entrance to a pool). I'm getting into my gear, minding my own business and the door to the pool kicks open and a stream of guys come ramming through all pissed off and yammering incoherently. All I can make out is random swear words. "Fucking fuck"! "Ass Cock!!!", etc...

So I bite and say "what's the problem". One of the guys looks at me (I remember he had yellow eye "whites" and they were full of hate) and yell's "MOTHERFUCKER WENT TO THE BATHROOM IN THE POOOOOOOL"!

I'm thinking to myself "calm down man, like you've never been in a pool where someone pissed before. the chlorine will take care of it", while thinking "how the hell would he know? you can't really see when someone pisses in the pool, did he actually get pissed on?"

So I said to him "how do you know"? And he replied "EX FUCKING ACTLY! MOTHERFUCKER SHIT!!! SHIT!!! IN THE FUCKING POOL!!!!!".
11/27/12 10:48 PM
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Sequoyah Sandford
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I am going to the gym in the AM if I see some funny shit I'll post pics or vid.
11/28/12 12:00 AM
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Keep if professional
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I see people come in to the gym and do nothing but bodyweight stuff they could have done at home. It's their money to burn, but damn.

There's also a guy who brings in a jumprope and jumps rope between sets. That wouldn't be that bad if he wasn't doing it in the most crowded part of the gym during peak hours.

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