Gorillas fight on film, could crush Cain and Tyson at same time

Sunday, August 28, 2016

I am, I dare say, the only reader who has fought a gorilla hand to hand.

I was little, perhaps eight years old. It was too, having been left an orphan by poachers. It was being raised in a game park in Nigeria, where i lived at the time. Pops took me to visit. The gorilla saw me, tackled me, and pooped on me.

My shirt tore. I cried. A couple years later, I started martial arts.

Now a video taken at Omaha, Nebraska’s Henry Doorly Zoo & Aquarium Nebraska zoo has captured two silver-backed gorillas engaged in an intense sparring match.

The action starts when one gorilla crosses in front of the other, inciting a charge, and an exchange of blows that would level Mike Tyson, Cain Velasquez, and that GOT Mountain guy at the same time.

 

 

So how would an elite fighter do vs. a gorilla?

Evidence indicates that an average 500 lb. silverback gorilla may be six to fifteen times stronger than the average male, which would make the average gorilla perhaps twice as strong as the strongest man on Earth.

Humans can obviously destroy a gorilla’s habitat, or kill one with a firearm, or even in numbers with spears, but how would a fighter vs. a Gorilla in mixed martial arts? The Unified Rules of mixed martial arts prohibit biting, and it would be challenging to communicate that rule to a gorilla. But even if you could, the outcome is certain.

The word kill is used in combat sports as a metaphor for winning. But a gorilla would kill any fighter in Earth, under MMA rules.

Consider these facts from Arcadia Moon:
•A male gorilla significantly outweighs most professional fighters.
His center of gravity is closer to the ground. Wrestlers will appreciate the huge advantage involved; erect bipedality is a serious liability here.
•One word: fangs.
•Being a wild animal, the gorilla will throw 100 percent of his available resources into the fight from the word go. Humans—even professional fighters or soldiers—never do this, unless they are in such a state of psychosis that they might as well be wild animals. (I have seen a 5-foot-tall woman in such a state, and weighing 100 pounds, require five humans at double her weight each to take her down and hold her down.)
•Because the gorilla’s fighting responses are instinctual, not trained, they will be faster than the human’s.
•The gorilla’s musculature and skeleton are considerably more robust than the human’s, which means that the gorilla will soak up much more punishment before being seriously injured. This makes the human’s fighter’s main hope of winning—almost immediately incapacitating the gorilla—very problematic.

Source: Slate

So could the fighter outrun a gorilla? While the silverback might ignore a man that ran away, if it was determined to catch him, he would.

Usain Bolt averages a speed of 23 MPH over 100 meters, on a track. By comparison, gorillas have been measured at speeds of 20-25 mph, in the bush.

So a gorilla could catch an elite runner. And fighters aren’t even elite runners.

So the answer is no, a human, no human, can beat a full grown gorilla.

I am no longer a young man, and gorillas live to be 35-40 generally, so that gorilla is probably dead and gone. I hope he had a happy life. And for the record, I never wanted a rematch.

And adding one final twist, the same zoo was the scene of a frightening moment when a gorilla broke some of the protective glass!

 

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