OtherGround Forums Couple banging in Bigfoot costumes shot by hunters

12 days ago
10/26/18
Posts: 643

COUPLE HAVING SEX OUTDOORS IN BIGFOOT COSTUMES GETS ACCIDENTALLY SHOT BY HUNTERS

 

An Ohio couple’s attempts to spice up their sex life with some kinky roleplay turned horribly wrong last night, as they were both shot by hunters while having sex in the woods in Sasquatch costumes.

43-year old Chris Mumford and 41-year old Janet Smith were wearing disguises and engaging in loud sex in a wooded area a few miles out of Woodsfield when they were spotted by local hunters.

Jarod Burns and his son were patrolling their property with rifles in hand, looking for signs of bears that may have awakened early from their hibernation, when he saw the hairy creatures.

“It looked like a couple of gorillas mating like crazy. They were standing over 6-foot tall and kept growling and moaning. They really looked like wild creatures.”

Mr. Burns and his son were convinced they were facing a couple of sasquatches, folkloric creatures said to be hairy, upright-walking, ape-like creatures that dwell in the North American wilderness.

“I know there aren’t any apes around here, but this is Bigfoot territory. We really thought this was our chance to kill one and finally prove they exist.”

The two men fired eight shots, hitting Mr. Mumford three times in the shoulder, the leg, and the abdomen, and hitting Ms. Smith twice in the thigh and the forearm.

Fortunately, the couple started screaming and swearing after getting shot, helping the hunters realize their mistake and call 911.

The adventurous couple was transported to Barnsville hospital where doctors were able to stabilize their condition and no longer fear for their lives.

The Monroe County Sheriff’s Office has opened an investigation to determine the exact circumstances of the incident, and criminal charges could eventually be filed against the negligent hunters.

Despite this unfortunate accident, Jarod Burns remains convinced that sasquatches exist and says he won’t hesitate to kill it if he sees a real one.

 

12 days ago
10/26/18
Posts: 644


12 days ago
4/27/15
Posts: 10722

Sure, sure.  Sounds super legit

12 days ago
10/26/18
Posts: 645


12 days ago
10/27/03
Posts: 22852

“I know there aren’t any apes around here, but this is Bigfoot territory. We really thought this was our chance to kill one and finally prove they exist.”

 

 

They’re actually real! Kill them quickly!

12 days ago
3/13/18
Posts: 1618

2 questions:

 

1- holy fuck at telling that story when people ask how you were shot!

 

2- what is the story with the forced decapitation of a tavern owner?

12 days ago
3/28/17
Posts: 5958
My life is now complete.
12 days ago
8/27/11
Posts: 1611

Source

12 days ago
10/26/18
Posts: 650
Charles Barkley -

Source

No way man. Not this time. I need this to be real.

12 days ago
1/13/12
Posts: 497

Please be real. 

12 days ago
2/28/13
Posts: 1585

Shocked this didn’t happen in Florida 

12 days ago
5/18/15
Posts: 2111

Open season on Furries. 

I’ll allow it. 

12 days ago
7/31/09
Posts: 16298
YaoMingia -

Shocked this didn’t happen in Florida 

I keep seeing more weirdness in Ohio. I'm convinced that Ohio is Florida light.

12 days ago
5/11/05
Posts: 2841

Post link

11 days ago
7/25/13
Posts: 9775

in for comedy gold

11 days ago
11/20/15
Posts: 4459

All I thought was, there are two people in the world who get off on fucking sasquatches, one male and one female, and they found each other... what are the odds?

11 days ago
1/3/08
Posts: 3520

Has anyone checked Passive Jay is ok?

11 days ago
8/29/08
Posts: 4809

Is there a link I know a guy who hunts these creatures.

11 days ago
11/14/11
Posts: 6970

damn i miss reading the weekly world news

11 days ago
10/21/09
Posts: 12128

Yeah only found one Chris Mumford in Ohio and he is 36, not 43

11 days ago
5/1/14
Posts: 4686

If real its bullshit that those guys would shoot anything while they were fucking.

11 days ago
4/27/15
Posts: 10728
Thrill Hammer -

If real its bullshit that those guys would shoot anything while they were fucking.

Nah - that's when they let their guard down

11 days ago
10/16/07
Posts: 8324
Are you all my dad? He's the only person I know that would believe everything he reads on the internet(late 60's).

Sad!~
11 days ago
2/11/14
Posts: 3366
grandchampion -

Post link

https://worldnewsdailyreport.com/couple-having-sex-outdoors-in-bigfoot-costumes-gets-accidentally-shot-by-hunters/

11 days ago
5/2/02
Posts: 26276

What the fuck were they shooting that they were hunting bear yet humans survive three shots a piece