Let me give you a look into my psych. I went on a few dates with this black girl over the past week and a half. She is hot, educated, driven, athletic, in reallly good shape, has a ton of the same passions as I do and she is practically in love with me. I made out with her but I haven't felt the need to aggressively hunt her down sexually yet.
On the flip side, I met up with this east indian girl on Thursday. the plan was just to go for a short walk on the seawall for like 30 minutes cause it was late. as soon as we saw each other it was instant magic. she had the biggest warmest most welcoming smile. It was so contagious. I could not help but give her the biggest smile ever as we walked toward each other. this was the first time meeting each other btw. we hugged and held each other for like 2 minutes. this was not a regular hug. I felt the desire to hold her hand immediately as we walked and she embraced the idea. No shit, within like 2 blocks of walking I could not control my desire to kiss her. we basically talked and made out and we would stop occasionally to sit on a bench and she would sit on my lap or I would insist she did and she would gladly do it. It was amazing. 2 and a half hours went by. on saturday we met up again. this time we went for a hike. she brought her dog along. we went back to my place after and cooked food together. the whole day we were groping each other, making out, holding hands. We have the best sexual chemistry ever. We ended up fucking at my house. it was as good as you would imagine. like 3 hours of fucking for a while. talking. resume fucking. pretty soon its 3 am. it's a full on time warp. come Sunday morning, today, when I'm supposed to hang out with the black girl, I full on made up some stuff about needed to sort out feelings towards my ex girlfriend because I wanted to leave the door open to seeing her maybe and also not let her know its cause I'm seein another person right now.
Anyway what's wrong with me? I need to elaborate on the east indian girl to paint a better picture but I must go to sleep. I will do it tomorrow.