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MMA in car: Russia overtakes Japan for freakshow fights, by a mile

Russian MMA has utterly overtaken JMMA for freakshow fights.

Automobiles were invented in 1886, by Germany's Carl Benz, as a replacement for animal-drawn conveyance. In 1908, with the debut of Ford's model T, cars became available to the masses. Following World War II, their use became so widespread that it is today unusual to not have a car in the USA.

The uses of automobiles too have expanded. For example, Americans eat 20% of their meals in their cars. In 2016, researchers determined that 59.77% of Americans had enjoyed amorous congress in a car. So perhaps it was inevitable that someone would wonder what happened if you held jiu-jitsu matches in a car.

Once upon a time, Japan owned the freakshow. The heavyweight GOAT Fedor Emelianenko fought Zuluzinho, who is now 14-11, and got submitted by Butterbean. 385 pound Giant Silva went 2-6, and only made it out of Round 1 once. However, the freakshow mantle has long since been overtaken by Russia.

529 pound Grigory Chistyakov fought strawweight Aleksandra Stepakova, a woman; that one ended in a decision. Russian blogger Oleg Mongol, sporting Conor McGregor's chest tattoo, fought a guy who ballooned his arms with synthol; turns out Notorious ink > synthol. In another intergender bout, Majit Suleymanov, a dwarf, fought Alexandra Puskin, a porn star; the winner was not MMA. But in addition to freakshow fights in a cage, Russia invented new platforms to fight in.

Jiu-jitsu was designed for self-defense, and that does not typically happen on a large mat. So besides quirky fascination, there's a practical side to this 2021 innovation in Russia. Dubbed "car jitsu", it's repurposing a car into a grappling mat.

And with grappling in a car established, it was only a matter of time before a car was used for an MMA bout.

You may well be thinking, fighting in a car is a poor cousin to fighting in a phonebooth. But in Russia, that's a thing too.

What do you think is next?